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“Are you done?” I asked.“Screw you!” she hissed.“Not a chance,” I said, snidely.I made myself ready, then quickly sprang to my feet and jumped away from her. But she didn’t move as I’d expected.“Look, I’m sorry if I upset you, but you need to hear the truth. I don’t care if you like it or not!”“Go! To! Hell!” Jolene spat at me.“I’m not sure what you want me to do. I don’t have a problem with you. I think you’ve got your priorities wrong and your head up your ass, but that’s your business at this point. I still want to be your friend. But I can’t help you until you decide that you want help, and you’re willing to take a good, hard look at yourself.“Here’s the rub. We’re stuck in here until YOU decide we can leave. I don’t have a problem with you. Sensei Jim doesn’t have a problem with you. YOU have a problem with you. And it’s all up to you. You aren’t going to get your promotion to 2nd Dan and I’m sure as hell not going to have sex with you. And if you tell Sensei that you won’t make. Though I know that the dogs will love me later today, as I hope the hungry gathered hordes of guests will also love me as my proud Master stands by basking in the glory of his slave presenting the best turkey ever roasted to a hushed and awed audience, (at this point I feel I should mention that when Master read this he said I had misspelt awed, in his opinion it should be odd), who are overcome with respect and admiration for this obvious domestic goddess. Especially considering that I am vegetarian and never have thought of roasting any bird before. I enjoyed this bucolic scene for a moment, even feeling the warm glow cover me, whilst Master’s opinion is all that matters I do want to do things well as everything I do is for and because of him. Slowly I came back to the present, and instead of the warm, candlelit room of my imagination filled with good cheer and thankfulness and people smiling and enjoying each other’s company listening to a string quartet playing appropriate music,.
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